Meet the Funkers

 


Name: Brad Lincoln

Nickname: B-Rad, assigned by Rich; reluctantly accepted.

What I do at Funkwerks: Co-Founder

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Solenna! Though it will never be made again... Well, maybe it will. 

Before Funkwerks: I worked in public accounting. 

When I fell in love with craft beer: I was underage in the Saginaw House cellar saloon in Flagstaff AZ. It is now defunct. My roommate was a bartender and introduced me to several beers including Cream Stout by Sam Adams. It was delicious and I never looked back.

Favorite part of my job: It would have to be between meeting all the incredible people in the craft industry and coming in at 10:00 in the morning. 

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Garrett Oliver but instead I accidentally spilled beer on him when Gordon and I met him a few years ago, when we crashed a party. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: A box of expensive cheese and a kitten calendar. Laura bought me this a few years back!

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Deceit aged in a whisky barrel with apples from the Tree of Knowledge.


Name: Gordon Schuck 

Nickname: The Schuck Machine, assigned by Rich; reluctantly accepted.

What I do at Funkwerks: Co-Founder and head brewer

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Our flagship Saison would be my favorite of our mainline series. 

Before Funkwerks: I was working in Steamboat for Moots Cycles building titanium bicycle frames. 

When I fell in love with craft beer: The first craft beer I liked was Celis White. That beer inspired me to start home brewing. 

Favorite part of my job: Creating new recipes and drinking beer. 

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Peter Bouckaert, because he is so knowledgable and he doesn't have too much hair on his head for when I kiss him. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: A T-shirt with my face on it. 

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: A Saison made of unicorn tears. 

If I was a beer: I would be a Saison, because it's a traditional style that has creative freedom. 

Favorite beer quote: "Ah beer, the cause and solution to all of life's problems" - Homer Simpson

 


 

 

Name: Richard J. Rende Jr. Esquire 

Been a member of the funky family since September 9th, 2013.

Nickname: REN DMC

What I do at Funkwerks: What don't I do at Funkwerks? 

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Tropic King.

Before Funkwerks: I was bartending at the finest whiskey bar in northern Colorado - William Oliver's Publick House.

When I fell in love with craft beer: In college I visited Colorado on vacation to do some shredding, and had a glass of 90 Shilling from Odell. It was way better than the crappy beer we drank back in Missouri. There was no going back. 

Favorite part of my job: Making awesome beer for a company that takes great care of me.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be:  Not sure what his/her name is, but the person responsible for brewing "BOMB!" over at Prairie Artisan Ales.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Bacon wrapped in bacon, stuffed with bacon, covered in bacon, and a pint to wash it all down. 

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: The Righteous Unicorn of Destruction. I'm not sure what it would taste like, but I know it would melt your face.

If I was a beer:  I would be a free beer. Cause free beer is the best kind of beer! 

Favorite beer quote: "Did you know that 2 to 3 glasses of beer per day can reduce your risk of giving a sh**?"


  

Name: Nick

Been a member of the funky family since June 22nd, 2015.

Nickname: Old Man Jenkins and Fluffhead are probably the two most popular, but I’ll pretty much answer to anything you want to call me.

What I do at Funkwerks: Production 

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Tropic King or Oud Bruin

Before Funkwerks: When I first got to Colorado I was a milkman…yes, a milkman. Before that I was in craft beer sales in Oregon.

When I fell in love with craft beer: When I first moved to Oregon from Iowa in 2006. I lived with my sister and brother in law who are big craft beer drinkers. They got me into it and the rest is history!

Favorite part of my job: The people that I work with. It’s like a big family here and that makes any job a lot easier.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: I’m going to say all of them because I respect what brewers are doing to make craft beer what it is today. That answer may or may not be a cop-out. You decide. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: For me? Beer always works!

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Saison-a-rita

If I was a beer:  I would probably drink myself.

Favorite beer quote: "Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution!"  -Homer Simpson


Name: Alex Hartz

Been a member of the funky family since June 22nd, 2015.

Nickname: Hartz, Hartzie, Hartzie Fartzie, Chuck.

What I do at Funkwerks: I work in production, with an emphasis on packaging. Boxes, bottles and kegs filled with our delicious beer! 

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Paisley!

Before Funkwerks: I worked wine harvests in California, New Zealand, Argentina and Australia.

When I fell in love with craft beer: My Buddy Chris and I took an Intro to Beer and Brewing class at UC Davis taught by the incomparable Charles Bamforth. We began seeking out new beers to try, and eventually tallied over 200. And, like cool-guy college student, we displayed a bottle of each at our townhouse. 

Favorite part of my job: The great humans and the great beer. And organizing. I like that too. 

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Vinnie Cilurzo, of my hometown brewery, Russian River Brewing Co. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Cool socks (and for the winters here, warm socks!)

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Cerberus, a dark, barrel-aged Belgian ale with a three-headed attack. 

If I was a beer:  I would be very happy boucle everyone loves beer!

Favorite beer quote: "I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." - Abraham Lincoln



 

Name: Chris Lawrence

Been a member of the funky family since August 2016.

What I do at Funkwerks: Brew liquid bread to feed our pet yeast.

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Dry Hopped Provincial

Before Funkwerks: I was lost and wandering through life aimlessly.

When I fell in love with craft beer: I learned to drink beer while living in Germany, and was afraid my return to the US would mean no more good beer. I was wrong, obviously. My first craft beer was Eel River’s Amber Ale, and I’ve never stopped exploring the US craft beer scene since.

Favorite part of my job: Not needing a gym membership, cuz I get swoll every day at work.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Mark Ruedrich at North Coast Brewing Co. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: A puppy. And a gift certificate to a puppy training course.

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Saison dry hopped with Annie’s Cheddar Bunnies, and aged in elvish hewn mahogany barrels in Rivendell whilst being lovingly watched over by Gandalf, and then served to dwarves and hobbits. 

If I was a beer:  I would put hair on your chest.

Favorite beer quote: “Beer, so much more than just a breakfast drink”. -Barack Obama



Name: Kipp Powell

Been a member of the funky family since March 4th, 2013.

Nickname: K-Train or The Tap Charmer

What I do at Funkwerks: Sling delicious nectar of the gods to amazing people. I also pull the strings of the taproom puppets!

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Dark Prophet (no longer in production).

Before Funkwerks: I was slinging my amazing mixology drinks at the Dirty Bird. 

When I fell in love with craft beer: When I was 22 years old and I was introduced to my first sour beer. I knew at that point I would have a hobby for life.

Favorite part of my job: Spending day in and day out with some of the greatest co-workers anyone can ask for. As well as sharing great beers and conversations with the people that come visit us at the brewery.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: I would have to say Sam Calagione. I have never met him, but I have enjoyed his beers in the past. I first learned about him from a documentary called Beer Wars. Sam, as well as many others featured in that film, have made me really love this amazing industry.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: You can never turn down pack of toilet paper. No one can!

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: The Hooligan- a saison aged in scotch barrels.

If I was a beer:  I would be a English-Style Barley Wine. I am strong, intense, complex and multi-layered with the perfect amount of sweetness. Something you can never get enough of!

Favorite beer quote: "Not every beer is for everyone, but there is a beer for everyone!" -Kipp Powell


 

Name: Savannah

Been a member of the funky family since May 20th, 2015.
Nickname: I wish I was cool enough to have one.

What I do at Funkwerks: Beertender/Resident Dinosaur Enthusiast  

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Depending on the day, it's either Nelson Sauvin or Raspberry Provincial.

Before Funkwerks: Wishing I was working at Funkwerks. 

When I fell in love with craft beer: I was first introduced to the craft beer culture when we made the move from Florida to Colorado in 2012. Experiencing the wondrous craft brewery scene that is Fort Collins opened up my eyes to beers full potential. Thanks Fort Collins.

Favorite part of my job: Being able to spend my days conversing with other craft beer enthusiasts. Whether you're a Master Cicerone or you don't know the four main ingredients of beer; there is always something to learn from one another.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: The brewer that was responsible for creating Dry Docks's Apricot Blonde. It's one of my absolute favorite easy drinkers; while rafting, hiking, or by the campfire it always satisfies my beer quench.

What is the perfect Secret Santa gift: Simple, a dinosaur costume for my wiener dog.

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Witasaurus: Belgian Witbeir (essentially our Blanka) that becomes a mainline beer instead of a seasonal.

If I was a beer: I would be a Belgian, session, fruit beer. A beer you could drink on the back patio while reading a book or while enjoying a home-cooked meal; a beer you want to get to know better, and drink multiple of. I would love to be a bright, beautiful color too!

Favorite beer quote: "Trust me, you can dance." -Beer


 

Name: Megan (Pronounced Meegan) Maureen Genvieve Kelly 

Been a member of the funky family since June 15th, 2015. 

Nickname: Most often it's Meegs. 

What I do at Funkwerks: Beertender in the taproom. 

Favorite Funkwerks beer: I have an appreciation for every Funkwerks beer that is made; I always choose to enjoy a Brother Rueben's Triple when it's on tap, but ultimately I must give the title to Oud Bruin as a respectful nod to the labor of love that is that beautiful beer.

Before Funkwerks: Slinging Bloody Marys and lattes at Snooze (previously) and contract one woman sweatshop sewing work (still).

When I fell in love with craft beer: It must have been the first time I had New Glarus (it was a Fat Squirrel). I love pretty much everything from Wisconsin.

Favorite part of my job: My coworkers! A little corny, but my favorite part of weekday shifts in the taproom is when I get to pour beer for my coworkers and bosses.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Any Trappist monk whose shiny bald head I could get my smoocher on.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: A set of pegs for the back wheel of my bike - that way I can always cart a buddy along with me.

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: It would be named Goose Eye (which is a nickname for a part on a sewing machine) or perhaps Seam Ripper. It would be drinkable but a bit strong - liquid encouragement for my more monotonous sewing jobs.

If I was a beer: I would be a Tequila barrel-aged Farmhouse. I respect history and tradition and at the same time like it when things are a little bit funky. 

Anne Rose would definitely be a lil' half pint of Shiner Ruby Red, and Inger would be our own Boubon Barrel Quad because I always feel happy and warm in her sparkly presence.



Name: Amberley Dawn Bruce

Been a member of the funky family since June 16th, 2016. 

Nickname: I don't have one yet.

What I do at Funkwerks: Taproom Beertender/ Resident Gardener.

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Hmm...They are all so good. Lately, my favorite beer has been Paisley because of it's ever evolving brett funkiness.

Before Funkwerks: Exploring this beautiful country and climbing rocks (Still happening.)

When I fell in love with craft beer:When I was underage and working at a craft beer bar in Fredericksburg, Virginia. A co worker introduced me to (outside of work, of course) Delirium Tremens from Brouwerij Huyghe, a Belgian Strong Pale Ale. It was love at first sip.

Favorite part of my job: All of the amazing humans that I work with and the great beer. Craft beer lovers are some of the greatest people you will ever meet!

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Matt Hess from River North Brewery in Denver for their Rum Barrel Aged Quandry.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Anything for my garden or outdoor adventures. And beer, of course!

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Quickdraw. A Single Hopped Saison that gives you increased rock climbing ability while temporarily boosting confidence. Pairs well with surviving sketchy situations.

If I was a beer: 



 
 

Name: Laura Szumilas

Been a member of the funky family since December 6th, 2010. 

What I do at Funkwerks: Sales

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Hard to decide on one:

Barrel: Rum Barrel Deceit, Oud Bruin

Limited release: Chai White!

Anytime of the year: Saison

Before Funkwerks: Working at a local restaurant as a bar manager and waiting for the perfect time to make a change.

When I fell in love with craft beer: I really started to appreciate craft beer when I moved to Fort Collins for college. We are spoiled with the luxury of having so many to choose from.

When I got the job at Funkwerks and I was given the opportunity to attend GABF for the first time (2011). Funkwerks took a silver medal for their Saison and the outpour of support and congratulations from the beer community and public was absolutely amazing. It is a great culture and community to be a part of and I’m lucky to be involved.

Favorite part of my job: Getting to meet so many friendly people from all over the United States, and sometimes world, that just want to get together and talk about their passion of beer. And of course getting to drink fantastic beers!

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Dan Carey from New Glarus. I don’t get a chance to have their beers very often but when I do I’m never disappointed.

If I was a beer (or a co-worker):  Gina would be a fruit beer infused with a pepper such as the Carolina Reaper pepper. She is sweet and spicy!


 
 

 

Name: Francesca Dreith

Been a member of the funky family since January 14th, 2014.

Nickname: Frank

What I do at Funkwerks: Marketing and Admin. I spread the beer news. 

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Cognac Barrel-Aged Deceit and Solstice (I still got one bottle left!). Saison and Nelson Sauvin are my go-tos. 

Before Funkwerks: I bartended at The Mayor of Old Town, a beer bar with 100 beers on draft. 

When I fell in love with craft beer: I was newly 21 shopping at Wilburs when I came across an 11.2 oz Delierium Nocturnum, on sale! It was probably old and oxidized, but I didn’t know the difference.

Favorite part of my job: The people. Beer people are rad. I have fun everyday I go to work. 

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would be: Garrett Crowell at Jester King for brewing Snorkel, a beer inspired by German Gose brewed with oyster mushrooms. Mmmm, umami.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: A tracking device for my scissors and phone charger. 

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Funk Tart - A saison infused with Pop Tarts. 

If I was a beer: I would be a sour beer, because I can be unexpectedly sour, but with time I get warmer and open up. 

Favorite beer quote: "Reality is an illusion that occurs due to a lack of beer."

 


 




 Name: Inger Gartner

Been a member of the funky family since June 1st, 2015.

Nickname: Nothing ever stuck, but my close friends call me ‘Ing’.

What I do at Funkwerks:  I provide safe havens in which our beers complete their life cycle, at watering holes and eateries in Northern Colorado and Iowa. (Sales).

Favorite Funkwerks beer:  I love all of our children differently, but equally.  That being said, Raspberry Provincial has been very well behaved lately…

Before Funkwerks:  I was working with my husband at our family owned business, Greyrock Concrete Design.

When I fell in love with craft beer: My first love was Indego Pale Ale from H.C. Berger,  which was coincidentally located the same building Funkwerks now inhabits!

Favorite part of my job: Sampling people on our beer and watching the surprise and enjoyment wash over their faces, and enjoying the great people in the communities I serve.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would it be:  Eric Salazar and Lauren Salazar for making my tastebuds braver and wiser.

The perfect Secret Santa gift:  Cute and comfortable ladies size 10 1/2 shoes.  A rare commodity. 

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer:  Jabberwocky  – Brewed with hops found only in Alice’s Wonderland, this dark strong ale has notes of mushrooms and cookies.  Pairs well with tea parties.

If I was a beer:  I would be a Gose, because I'm fairly bright, and just a smidgen salty.  Damian would be an American Brown, because despite his subtle sweetness, he can be a little nutty.


 

 

Name: Damian Schlereth

Been a member of the funky family since May 22nd, 2015.

Nickname: Life Commander

What I do at Funkwerks: Colorado/AZ Brewery representative.

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Deceit   

Before Funkwerks: I was waiting to work at Funkwerks

When I fell in love with craft beer: Drinking Schlafly in my hometown of St. Louis, MO! 

Favorite part of my job: Drinking the world's best beer with the best beer people.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would it be: Dan Graves at Vine St. Pub (Mountain Sun) for brewing the best single hop double IPA I've ever had. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Banana hammock! (or a new pair of USMC OD Green Silkies)

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: Peachy King or Blanka.

If you were a beer:  I would be an Oud Bruin, because I too have a slight sour bite, notes of oak or woodiness, and a dry tart finish.  Gina Lamont would be Mad Dog 20/20 because she is also a mostly wine-based refreshment that "Colors Your World".

Favorite beer quote: "I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer." - Homer Simpson


 
 

Name: Breanna Hanson

Been a member of the funky family since August 12th, 2015. 

Nickname: Bree or Beer

What I do at Funkwerks:  Colorado off-premise Brewery Rep

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Saison and Belgian Stout, though I have yet to meet one I don't like.

Before Funkwerks: I worked in University admissions recruiting, and healthcare.

 When I fell in love with craft beer:  It was during college in Wisconsin in the mid-2000s, and his name was New Glarus. We met at a bar one night and immediately hit it off. We still stay in touch, but with me in Colorado and NG in Wisconsin, it's just once or twice a year over holidays and the occasional wedding.

Favorite part of my job: Getting to talk about and sell a product I love all day every day.

If I could kiss a craft brewer on the head for brewing such delicious beer (besides Gordon, of course), he/she would it be: Whatever genius over at Firestone Walker came up with Parabola. And the New Glarus brewers for teaching me that beer can be so much more than a warm macro drank out of a plastic cup.

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Beer. Definitely beer. And an original "Mean Girls" movie poster.

Favorite Mythical Funkwerks Beer: A baked potato beer. That actually doesn't sound delicious, but combines my two great loves: potatoes and beer. It would be a Belgian-style Frites beer.

Favorite beer quote: "Thank you, craft beer breweries, for making my drinking problem seem like a neat hobby." - Jimmy Fallon


 
 

Name: Natosha Williams

Been a member of the funky family since April 12th, 2012. 

Nickname: Natosha

What I do at Funkwerks: Accounting

Favorite Funkwerks beer: Saison

Before Funkwerks: I was going to School.

When I fell in love with craft beer: When I started working at a brewery that makes the best beer ever!

Favorite part of my job: Hmmm, you know, inventory, paying bills, it's all great fun. 

The perfect Secret Santa gift: Gift cards, candles, and anything that smells good. :)

Favorite beer quote: My favorite beer quote today anyway…”Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.” -Henry Lawson